A Blackberry Lovestory

Today I was able to take a look at the iPhone X.  It really is a remarkable piece of technology.  I think we’re closer to Star Trek level communicators than we think.

We have come so far in the smart phone arena in a relatively short time.  My own introduction to the phenomenon was in 2006 with the Blackberry 7100g.  

Hubba hubba 

As clunky and awkward as it seems when viewed through 2017 lenses, this was a state-of-the-art device.  I was won over initially because of the ability to send and receive work emails on the phone, which was unique to Blackberry at the time.  But it also had useful features, games, a user-friendly REAL keyboard and I thought it looked really cool. Plus Blackberry wasn't popular as yet in Barbados so I felt like a pioneer.

I loved that phone!  I think it was the first one I owned with a full holster rather than a clip on.  I wasn't just a pioneer: I was collar and tie cowboy!

We stayed together for about a year, during which time that phone served me well.  It never gave me any problems and did everything asked of it.  So the end of the relationship was especially sad.  Only for me though… my friends found it hilarious.

I was at Lord WIlloughby’s Tavern (where else) and went to use the washroom.  My golden stream had just hit the porcelin when the blackberry rang.   Well it chirped really.  Such a cute sound.  Sigh.

Anyway, my right hand was otherwise occupied so I attempted to answer the phone, which was holstered on my left hip, with my left hand.

I successfully managed to unholster it and had time to see that it was my friend Claire calling before the phone slipped from my grasp.

Thanks to my catlike reflexes and superior hand-eye coordination, I was able to snatch it neatly out of the air… is what I would have said if I had catlike reflexes and superior hand eye coordination. Instead I snatched nothing and the phone plopped neatly into the toilet bowl.

Into which I was still peeing.

My next thought was that I needed to get it out quickly before it was irrevocably damaged, so I crouched down - peeing all the while - and tried to fish my phone out of a public toilet, which was now partially filled with the remains of Heinekens I consumed an hour previously. 

I managed to grab the phone and carefully returned to a standing position.  It was then I noticed that the tip of my tie had apparently spent a few seconds in the bowl while I was phone fishing.
I should have mentioned: I was in my work clothes at the time.

The phone was dead so I blow dried it - and my tie - as well I could before returning to the bar.  I placed it in a plastic bag I got from the bartender, and gave it to my drinking partner Paul, who knew someone that fixed phones.

A week later the phone was returned to me, cleaned, disinfected and in working condition, but I could not bring myself to use it again. 

The love was gone.

So I sold that Blackberry 7100g.  I know the buyer must have thought she jucked out my eye by negotiating an amazing price.

I replaced that phone with another Blackberry and 3 others after that, but I never again experienced the same completeness I felt with my first.

Unbeknownst to Claire, I have always blamed her for causing my first Blackberry relationship to go all pissy.  Damn you Claire!